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WWE Payback Predictions

I’m a huge WWE fan. My whole family is, actually. My husband and I both grew up through the Monday Night Wars and the Attitude Era, and ours kids have been watching it with us since birth. This month’s pay per view show, WWE Payback, is this coming Sunday (May 1st) and yes; we will be watching it via WWE Network. So the question is: how mad will the WWE Universe be on Monday morning? Let’s look at the card.

  • U.S. Champion Kalisto vs. Ryback (Kickoff Match)- First of all, it aggravates me that a championship match, even if it is only the U.S. title, has been relegated to the preshow. I feel like it devalues the belt, but moving on… I  hope expect that Kalisto retains. Luchador style makes for amazing wrestling and it is soooo under-represented in WWE. And who is trying to get behind Ryback anyway? Seriously, Vince? I know he looks like everything they could want in a champion, but the charisma simply isnt there. Get him a manager or get him off the TV.

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  • Enzo Amore & Colin Cassady vs. The Vaudevillains (WWE Tag Team Championship No. 1 Contenders’ Tournament Final)- This match is going to be so much fun! Enzo and Cass are just too hot to lose right now. I’ll be honest. I haaaatte the obnoxious Jersey Shore gimmick, but they execute it so perfectly I think I MIGHT consider being a fan. Bonus prediction: The actual fun part will come from New Day’s unnecessary yet entertaining presence at ringside.
  • Dolph Ziggler vs. Baron Corbin- ***Show stealer*** This match is going to look great. It’s a shame the storyline is so shallow. I assume Corbin wins since he’s the new kid on his way up the mountain. But gatekeeper Ziggler is going to make him impress us for that street cred.
  • Sami Zayn vs. Kevin Owens- ***Show stealer*** Can there be 2 show stealers? These two have history and a connection that cannot be denied. I cannot WAIT to see this match and I hope they don’t hold anything back. Can I tell you a secret? Sami Zayn has not won me over yet. He’s clearly talented, but my faith is still in Kevin Owens. He’s the heel and I hate him accordingly, but he seems more polished to me. Sami will win anyway, but this rivalry wil continue for a while after Sunday so it’s ok.
  • Intercontinental Champion The Miz vs. Cesaro- So Maryse once hosted a con panel that I attended (ACCC 2014) and during the Q&A I asked her if she would ever return to WWE alongside her husband Miz “Miss Elizabeth style”. She said maybe. I’m quite entertained to see that she has now made a return, even though I have never been a fan of hers. Can you tell by my anecdote just how little I care about this match? Cesaro will win the actual match, but Maryse will interfere so Miz retains the belt.
  • Dean Ambrose vs. Chris Jericho- Oh that Jericho could be even 5 years younger for this match. It’s going to be wild with a few impressive spots. I’m not entirely sure that Dean Ambrose needs the push from Jericho, but I’m glad he’s getting it all the same. I predict that this is the official start of his climb to WWE World Heavyweight Champion.
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    WWE Women’s Champion Charlotte vs. Natalya- Ok so for the record, I’m a bit sad that Charlotte has been reduced to the spawn of Ric Flair. Charlotte is a great in-ring talent in her own right, and it really wasn’t necessary for them to focus on her legacy status in this way… but moving on! I’m #teamNattie all the way and will be until she retires! Natalya is the unsung hero of the women’s division and she needs more championship belt!! Unfortunately, I suspect Charlotte will retain in spectacularly dirty fashion and break my heart.

  • Mr. McMahon will announce who controls Raw at WWE Payback- Stipulations, schmipulations! Wrestlemania loss be damned, Shane-O-Mac is still here. And he’ll be controlling Raw from now on because this past month of shows has been some of the best I’ve seen in a long time. Maybe Stephanie will tantrum and quit and go on a real vacation for a couple years. And HHH can get the hell outta the ring and stop taking ring time and attention away from the younger talent who need it.
  • WWE World Heavyweight Champion Roman Reigns vs. AJ Styles- I’m really not sure which way this match will go. They both strike me as incomplete (not bad) champions. I just wish they both had better mic skills. I don’t know what it is about this version of AJ that bugs me but I do kinda wish he’d cut his hair again. I expect Roman retains, but goes full heel in the process. I see him doing better as an IDGAF anti-hero than the face he’s trying to be right now. We’ll see I guess.

So WWE geeks, do you agree? Disagree? Are you just ashamed that I’m grown woman who is entertained by this stuff? During the show I’ll be hanging out on Twitter, so come yell at the screen with me!!

What about you?